AfterM*A*S*H Episode 9 - Thanksgiving of '53

Season 1, Episode 9: Thanksgiving of '53
Original Air Date: 11/21/83
Written by: Ken Levine & David Isaacs
Directed by: Burt Metcalfe

The Potters are throwing Thanksgiving dinner, and they've invited the Klingers, Father Mulcahy, and some surprise guests.

The Klingers are first to arrive, and Max gets misty about missing his family in Toledo. He asks Col. Potter if he can call his family, but Col. Potter puts him off and asks him for some help setting the table.

Also invited is the Potter's daughter Evie (Sandy Burnard) and her family, Bob Scanell (Pat Cranshaw), an old war buddy of Col. Potter's, and Dr. Pfeiffer, who is happy for the free meal. Mike D'Angelo also shows up, and sort of invites himself.

There's still no sign of the Potter's surprise guests, and they keep delaying Klinger and his call home. Luckily, a friend of Father Mulcahy's has come along, and he's spending the whole day on the phone talking to his family.

Finally, the surprise guests arrive--Klinger's family from Toledo, invited by the Potters as a gift to Klinger. Klinger nearly weeps with joy when he sees them.

After dinner, everyone sits around the piano and sings, while Dr. Pfeiffer is still eating. Klinger's parents ask Max and Soon-Lee to come back to Toledo and live with them--the first time they've really accepted Soon-Lee--but Klinger wants to stay where he is and build a life.


Fun Facts: We've heard Evie mentioned on M*A*S*H a few times, now we get to see her! The Potter's son (mentioned in Season Five), however, seems to be lost to the mists of time.

Evie's husband--here called Bruce--is played by James Widdoes (most famous as Hoover in Animal House), not Dennis Dugan, who appeared in Season Eleven's "Strange Bedfellows" as the Potters' son-in-law, Bobby.

This episode features another installment of The Young Sherman Potter Chronicles: Bob Scanell talks about a time in the Ardennes Forest he, Col. Potter, and two others "Got trapped in a barn with the Perault Sisters and their goat."

The end credit sequence (pictured) is made up of snapshots from the party, a nice touch.

Alma Cox does not appear in this episode.


Favorite Line: Mike D'Angelo gives Father Mulcahy a glimpse of his life back in school: "I was very active in college: Hygiene Officer for the Young Republicans..."

AfterM*A*S*H Episode 8 - Sunday, Cruddy Sunday

Season 1, Episode 8: Sunday, Cruddy Sunday
Original Air Date: 11/14/83
Written by: Dennis Koenig
Directed by: Nick Havinga

Everyone is on hand for Father Mulcahy's Sunday Sermon, and its going on so long even Col. Potter is bored.

After it ends, everyone heads outside for a Visitor's Day Brunch, and several of the patients are met by Rev. Purvis Gentry (Geoffrey Lewis), a "freelance preacher" and used auto salesman. He's slick and fast-talking, and the minute Col. Potter sees him, he tells him in no uncertain terms to leave the premises.

Mike D'Angelo takes a real shine to Mildred Potter's niece Charlotte (Miriam Byrd-Netherly) and offers to personally show her around the hospital, much to Alma Cox's displeasure.

One of the patients doesn't have any one visiting him, so he's easy pickings for Rev. Gentry, who, despite Potter's admonition, has made his way into General General. He convinces one paraplegic patient he can walk if he just "believes" enough, which horrifies Father Mulcahy. He tells Purvis he's giving the young man false hope, but Purvis is unmoved, snidely insisting that Mulcahy is not a true man of God.

Despite all this, the young man tries to walk, and immediately crumbles to the floor. Mulcahy is there to help him up, trying to convince him that just because he will never walk again, he still has much to live for--"Not long ago, a man who couldn't walk was President of the United States! Do you think he had a reason to live?"

Mike D'Angelo really tries to get Charlotte to have a relationship with him, but she's recently widowed and just isn't ready. She departs, and D'Angelo is clearly very hurt.

After a patient determined to be admitted for being crazy smashes his car into the front door of the hospital (therefore "proving" he's crazy), Mike D'Angelo is being comforted back in his office by Alma Cox, who promises to take care of all the paperwork. Mike D'Angelo remarks how lucky he is to have her--"Now, if I could only find a woman."


Fun Facts: This episode features a nice debate which would later be framed in terms of Red States/Blue States--Rev. Gentry insists Mulcahy isn't a true religious man because he's from Philadelphia.

Soon-Lee does not appear in this episode.


Favorite Line: Mike D'Angelo tries to woo Charlotte, and he mentions his life since his divorce: "In the six years since my marriage fell apart, and I have had many opportunities for amorous escapades. But I have remained, in all but the most technical sense, pure."

AfterM*A*S*H Episode 7 - Little Broadcast of '53

Season 1, Episode 7: Little Broadcast of '53
Original Air Date: 11/7/83
Written by: Dennis Koenig
Directed by: Burt Metcalfe

Klinger starts a private radio station--KMAX--for the staff and patients of General General.

As Klinger plays music and makes announcements, we follow the trials of a new arrival, Nurse Canfield (Alice Cadogan), who is in over her head without a paddle. No one has bothered to show her around, so she's constantly dealing with one problem after the other: not knowing where anything is, not knowing whether to believe what some of the patients tell her (like the one who asks for her a back rub), and not knowing enough to find a way to make time to eat lunch.

Meanwhile, Father Mulcahy is trying to connect with a patient who seems either unable or unwilling to talk. There's a second patient, named Ernie(Timothy Stack) who talks too much--he's more than happy to take up all of Mulcahy's time (even when he's in the men's room!) going on and on about his problems, which are relatively minor.

Nurse Canfield is the victim of another prank by two of the patients, and she gets so fed up that she decides to quit. Col. Potter tries to talk her out of it by offering her some fatherly advice, which she takes to heart. Deciding to stick around, she ends up helping save the life of one of the two pranksters, with the help of the other one: after she shows what she's made of, the patient apologizes for giving her such a hard time.

Outside in the hall, the mute patient Father Mulcahy was trying to reach stands by Klinger's radio station, and sings along to one of the songs. Mulchay notices this, and finally connects with the young man.

Later, Mulcahy is in the radio booth as Klinger signs off for the day. He tells Klinger how his radio program helped the young patient, and Klinger promises to keep doing the show.


Fun Facts: This episode features a crawl that says: "Our grateful thanks to The Veterans Bedside Network", which was the organization in that "Toughest Ticket" ad.

Mrs. Potter, Alma Cox, and Soon-Lee do not appear in this episode.


Favorite Line: Klinger makes an announcement about the day's events: "There's a bus tour: Historic Hannibal: Mark Twain's house, Mark Twain's school, and the famous Courtney Hotel, once slept in my Merl Utley--who once met Mark Twain!"

AfterM*A*S*H Episode 6 - Shall We Dance

Season 1, Episode 6: Shall We Dance
Original Air Date: 10/31/83
Written by: Ken Levine & David Isaacs
Directed by: Will Mackenzie

Mike D'Angelo holds a morning staff meeting, and everyone's concerns are ignored except for his own and Alma Cox's. D'Angelo tells them a troupe of dance instructors are coming to the hospital to put on a dance for the patients (something he was against until the Mayor called and told him what a great idea it was).

Alma Cox's main concern is the banning of the book From Here To Eternity, because of its "suggestive" nature. To prove her point, she begins reading a lurid passage from it, and from there we enter a flashback of Col. Potter's, remembering an experience he had with Mildred in a similar setting to the scene from the book.

The staff argues over Cox's censorship, so D'Angelo hands the book to Father Mulcahy to read and decide whether it should be banned. The meeting ends with not one medical issue discussed.

After the meeting, Dr. Pfeiffer asks Alma Cox's assistant Bonnie out on a date, but she's not interested--she only has eyes for Klinger, who has to keep giving Bonnie the brush-off. Bonnie tells Dr. Pfeiffer about another girl named Margie, who will go out with any doctor.

Pfeiffer and Margie meet for a "date" in an OR, and within a few moments of meeting they're tearing off their clothes. Alma Cox catches them and stops it, deciding to lord it over Pfeiffer in perpetuity.

Father Mulcahy agrees to fill in for another priest at his church, and he happens to be hearing confessions when Alma Cox stops by. She professes her unrequited love for her boss, and even going to see the movie version of From Here To Eternity.

Father Mulcahy comforts her, and tells her her feelings are understandable. He gives her a way to unburden herself, by forgiving someone else their failings. Later that night, during the dance, Cox follows through on Mulcahy's advice, and forgives Dr. Pfeiffer, promising not to rat him out.

Just as she's about to leave, Mike D'Angelo shows up, and offers to dance with her. Alma is overjoyed at this little bit of personal time with her boss, the man she loves.


Fun Facts: One of the biggest problems with the show so far to my mind is the general cartoonishness of the show's two "villains", Mike D'Angelo and Alma Cox. This episode though does a nice job at fleshing Cox out a bit, making her more of an actual person. In many ways, her rigid demeanor is a lot like Hot Lips' was in the first couple seasons of M*A*S*H.


Favorite Line: After Bonnie turns down Dr. Pfeiffer after a second date request, she tells him about a girl named Margie, who is a "pushover" for doctors. Pfeiffer asks for his gift of flowers back, but Bonnie tells him, "You won't need them with Margie."

Pfeiffer is elated: "Finally it pays being a doctor!"

AfterM*A*S*H Episode 5 - Night Shift

Season 1, Episode 5: Night Shift
Original Air Date: 10/24/83
Written by: Everett Greenbaum and Elliott Reed
Directed by: Edward H. Feldman

Dr. Pfeiffer is forced to stay on duty overnight at General General when his relief calls out sick. Already having put in a full day, he's exhausted and a bit short-tempered about being stuck there all night.

Meanwhile, Col. Potter is trying to have a romantic night with his wife, but gets interrupted when Dr. Pfeiffer calls looking for advice on a case. After a few moments, he grows distracted from his dinner and decides to head in to the hospital.

When he arrives, he sees Klinger working late, too. He asks why Klinger isn't home with Soon-Lee, but Klinger won't answer and jumps in the elevator.

Col. Potter assists Pfeiffer in surgery, and he notices that Pfeiffer is barely able to stay awake. Pfeiffer claims its because he's working such a long day, but Potter isn't buying it. Pfeiffer admits he's moonlighting at another hospital--"The only way to make ends meet", he claims. Potter is sympathetic, and offers to stay on duty while Pfeiffer gets some sleep.

There's more trouble--a fight breaks out between two patients (after one of them makes a racist remark towards the other), Father Mulcahy tries to sneak in the young son of a patient even though its against the rules, and then the elevator breaks down with Father Mulcahy and a young woman named Sarah (a prostitute posing as a nurse, played by Carolsue Walker) stuck inside.

We find out that Klinger is working all night to find three mattresses missing from inventory, which are being used (unbeknownst to him) in a prostitution racket involving the young woman and her pseudo-pimp (David Graf) being run in a back room of the hospital!

After talking with Mulcahy, Sarah decides to go straight, and gives up her life on the street. She tells Klinger where to find the missing mattresses, and departs. Col. Potter finally goes home, to find Mildred already in bed, the whole romantic evening a washout.


Fun Facts: The guy who accompanies Pfeiffer's patient is played by actor/comedian Blake Clark, who also played an MP in "Goodbye, Farewell, and Amen." (He's the MP who ships the North Korean musicians away in the truck)

Actor David Graf also appeared on M*A*S*H, as the tough-as-nails Lieutenant in Season Ten's "A Holy Mess."

There's a scene in the elevator where Sarah talks about a great movie she saw, The Song of Bernadette. Father Mulcahy says he's never seen it, even though he mentions how much he liked it in an episode of M*A*S*H.

Mike D'Angelo and Alma Cox do not appear in this episode.


Favorite Line: Sarah, trapped in the elevator with Mulcahy, is scared he knows who she is. Before he can get half a sentence out, she immediately defends herself with, "Father, I had a terrible childhood!"

AfterM*A*S*H Episode 4 - Staph Inspection

Season 1, Episode 4: Staph Inspection
Original Air Date: 10/17/83
Written by: Ken Levine & David Isaacs
Directed by: Burt Metcalfe

Things are happening all at once at General General: an old Cavalry friend of Col. Potter's named Rivers (Charles Tyner) shows up, a staph infection breaks out, and news comes that a staff inspection is taking place in just three days!

Mike D'Angelo puts the word out about the inspection, and puts Alma Cox in charge of getting the hospital in shape. She takes this as an opportunity to threaten Klinger's job once again.

Dr. Pfeiffer examines Rivers, and he believes its cancer. He tells this to Col. Potter, who flatly refuses to believe that the tough old man that he served with back in WWI is dying.

Meanwhile, news of the inspection spreads through the hospital, and rumors begin to fly: at first, layoffs are possible, then certain, then the whole hospital is being closed!

Col. Potter examines Rivers himself, and Pfeiffer is, sadly, right: its cancer. Col. Potter takes it upon himself to deliver the news to Rivers personally, but when the time comes he can't quite bring himself to tell Rivers the truth. Instead, they talk about the old days.

D'Angelo puts pressure on Col. Potter to get to the bottom of the staph infection, but Potter is in no mood, and barks at D'Angelo to get off his back.

Potter is sitting quietly in his office when he's told Rivers is getting worse, and late at night they share a bottle of Cognac, swapping old stories. They stay up all night, drinking and laughing.

The next morning, Klinger tries to confiscate the one last bottle of booze he finds--the one in Col. Potter's hand as he walks down the hall. having just left his friend's room. He tries to take it from Potter, who angrily jerks it out of Klinger's hand. Bemoaning that "life is too short" for everyone to be working so hard just for the inspection, he orders everyone to go home and get some rest.

The morning of the inspection, Dr. Pfeiffer determines who's spreading the staph infection: Mike D'Angelo! All his glad-handing has been the culprit, so he's put in isolation, unable to greet the government inspectors (who are instead met by a patient who runs around the hospital flashing people).

A few days later, from a quarantined room, D'Angelo announces that General General passed the inspection with flying colors. As he drones on and on, each member of the staff stops listening and wanders off, leaving D'Angelo talking to an empty hall.


Fun Facts: The final scene with Potter and Rivers is exceptional: the room is dark, with only one small light over River's bed. As they talk, the camera pans back slowly, and Potter and Rivers get smaller and smaller.

Mrs. Potter does not appear in this episode.


Favorite Line: There's a nice sequence, done without any words, where Klinger, upon orders from Alma Cox, has to confiscate all the hooch the various veterans have smuggled in the hospital. He finds hidden bottles all over the place, and one patient even has an old football filled with the stuff!

AfterM*A*S*H Episode 3 - Snap, Crackle, Plop

Season 1, Episode 3: Snap, Crackle, Plop
Original Air Date: 10/10/83
Written by: Ken Levine & David Isaacs
Directed by: Nick Havinga

Klinger and Soon-Lee have a talk about possibly getting a car, an extravagance for a couple with their income. But Klinger is so in love with his new wife that he plans to try, and he leaves the house all smiles.

His good mood is quickly dissipated when Alma Cox tells him that he has to take the Civil Service Exam--something Klinger was unaware of--today, at 5pm. If he fails, he loses his job. Klinger tries to protest that he wasn't told about the test and has no time to prepare, but Cox doesn't care.

Klinger turns to Col. Potter for help, who in turn goes to D'Angelo to see if they can give Klinger more time. But D'Angelo is indifferent to Klinger's plight, and, with a schedule packed with meaningless PR functions, is happy to turn the responsibility for the decision to Alma Cox.

When Klinger learns of this, he goes into a panic, and has a tough time dealing with the new reality that Col. Potter no longer has the pull he had back in Korea. Potter is sure Klinger can pass the test, and sends Klinger home to study.

Potter meets up again with D'Angelo, and tells him they desperately need a new autoclave. Once again, D'Angelo is indifferent to Potter's plight, telling him the hospital's budget is bare. But what about this new canopy that's being built? D'Angelo says that's "beautification", which, in his mind, is more important than a medical expense.

Klinger crams for the test, and returns to the hospital to take it, Alma Cox is positively gleeful about Klinger's impending failure, so much so that she's brought in a younger man (her nephew) to take the test as well, so he can fill in for Klinger once he fails.

Meanwhile, Father Mulcahy is dealing with a patient who is constantly in the hospital due to clumsy--but serious--accidents. The patient, named Walt (Michael Huddleston) is starting to grow convinced God is trying to kill him. At first, Mulcahy dismisses this, but soon grows concerned when Walt states he's hearing messages from God.

Mulcahy does some research on the man, and finds he served in Korea. He also learns that Walt was serving on a ship when it was hit, and 80% of his fellow crewmen were killed. After that, Walt started volunteering for dangerous missions, seemingly trying to get killed.

Mulcahy finds Walt sitting alone in a room, staring out the window. Mulcahy tries to convince him that God is trying to kill him, and that he doesn't have to keep risking his life. Walt states that God talks to him, and he's being driven slowly mad.

Mulcahy tries to calm Walt down, but instead he decides he's going to ask God directly what He wants--he climbs onto a table, opens the window, and jumps!

At that same moment, D'Angelo is throwing a big party to celebrate the new canopy. As he's droning on, giving a speech about how humble he is, Walt plummets from through the air...crashing into the new canopy!

Everyone rushes to Walt's aide, and even though he has a few broken bones...he's alive. Father Mulcahy rushes down and tries to convince Walt that this was God's way of telling him He wants Walt to live. Walt, finally, seems convinced. D'Angelo is at first upset his new canopy is smashed, but when Col. Potter points out that the press will eat up the story, D'Angelo changes his tune.

Meanwhile, back inside, Klinger finishes the test. Alma Cox totals up the scores, and her nephew beats Klinger's score by four points. Klinger is dejected, until Cox sees that part of the rules of the Civil Service Exam is that anyone taking it who is a veteran gets a bonus five points, putting Klinger ahead and letting him keep his job.

Cox and her nephew are furious, and Klinger is delirious: "I can't believe it! The Army saved my bacon!"

After Cox throws out her nephew (who is happy to go back to being a rodeo clown), Klinger tries to make peace with her. But Cox is having none of it, convinced that, one day, she'll dance at his termination. But there's a slight humorous tone in both their barbs, as if Cox just might be lightening up.

Later, Klinger and Soon-Lee inspect a used car for sale, and makes plans to buy it...after Klinger passes the next Civil Service Exam level, the G4. Soon-Lee offers, "Cars should be much cheaper by then!"


Fun Facts: Another decent show, with the Mulcahy plotline being rather chilling, and something that would've worked well on M*A*S*H.

There's a cute bit of business with the used car: Klinger inspects it in the usual manner: kicking the tires, pressing up and down on the bumper. Soon-Lee, clearly not knowing what he husband is doing, simply mimics his actions, trying to figure out what they're supposed to learn from this.

Mrs. Potter and Dr. Pfeiffer do not appear in this episode.


Favorite Line: The barber asks D'Angelo for the 75 cents that the haircut costs. D'Angel hands him some money and says, "Here's three quarters...keep the change."

After he departs, Col. Potter asks, "I thought haircuts were fifty cents." The barber replies, "They are."

AfterM*A*S*H Episode 2 - Klinger Vs. Klinger

Season 1, Episode 2: Klinger Vs. Klinger
Original Air Date: 10/3/83
Written by: Ken Levine & David Isaacs
Directed by: Will Mackenzie

A patient named Smith (Norbert Weisser) arrives, claiming to be a veteran, but he has no identification with him. The idealistic Dr. Pfeiffer wants to admit him, but D'Angelo flatly refuses since no one can prove he's a veteran.

Once Col. Potter gets wind of this, he takes responsibility and has the man admitted, much to Pfeiffer's relief and D'Angelo's worry.

Meanwhile, Soon-Lee has a talk with Klinger, trying to convince him that they should bring her mother over from Korea to live with them. Klinger agrees, but we quickly see this was a plot of Soon-Lee's to get her entire family to come to America. Klinger is sympathetic, but he reminds his wife that with their tiny home and modest income, there's just no way they can afford it.

Soon-Lee decides to help out financially by getting a job, something Klinger finds difficult to accept. They argue about it, and Soon-Lee eventually gives in, but Klinger can see she's hurt. He changes his mind completely when she visits the hospital, and a patient, not knowing she's Klinger's wife, makes a crack and calls her a "gook."

Klinger gets enraged and defends his wife, and is aghast that, after all the hardships she's suffered, she is treated that way in America. Soon-Lee gets upset and leaves, but not before she sees her husband stick up for her.

Later, in Post Op, Col. Potter and Dr. Pfeiffer talk to their patient, and he mentions what platoon he was in--a German one. Col. Potter and Pfeiffer realize instantly they've worked on an ex-Nazi!

Before they have a chance to explain, their boss D'Angelo bursts in, wanting to have his picture taken with this wounded war veteran. Potter decides not to say anything, realizing that picture--which makes the front page of the newspaper--will keep them both out of trouble.

Later, Soon-Lee writes a postcard to her mother, promising she and Max will try and bring them to America as soon as possible, mentioning what a kind, sweet, and caring man her husband is.


Fun Facts: Another decent show, with the comedic plot--the hospital accidentally bestows all kind of attention on a Nazi--straight out of M*A*S*H. The episode doesn't quite pay it off as well, but its still a fine, funny idea.

Mrs. Potter does not appear in this episode.


Favorite Line: Klinger's scene with the young bigoted soldier is just great. In the midst of defending his wife, he barks: "You don't know what she's been through, and she has to come here and listen to your crapola!"

AfterM*A*S*H Episode 1 - September '53/Together Again

Season 1, Episode 1: September of '53/Together Again
Original Air Date: 9/26/83
Written by: Larry Gelbart
Directed by: Burt Metcalfe

Col. Potter returns home from Korea to his beloved wife Mildred (Barbara Townsend). He finds himself offered the job of Chief of Staff at General Pershing Veteran's Hospital, and even though he has doubts about his boss Mike D'Angelo (John Chappell), he feels he do some good, tending to the wounded veterans of multiple wars.

Meanwhile, his former clerk Klinger is not doing quite as well. When we find Klinger, he is before a judge, having been busted for running the kind of racket he would have back in Korea. With his wife Soon-Lee (Rosalind Chao) watching, Klinger asks for mercy from the judge, explaining that he's having a hard time readjusting to life as a civilian.

He mentions that the things he did back in Korea--while maybe not quite on the up-and-up--he would be commended for, but back in America he gets arrested for. The judge shows Klinger mercy, especially when Klinger mentions he has an honest job waiting for him in Missouri--as Col. Potter's assistant.

Klinger and Soon-Lee arrive, and Klinger finds dealing with all the hospital redtape difficult. His loose, cutting-corners-ways is especially disdained by D'Angelo's executive secretary, the stern and humorless Alma Kox (Brandis Kemp).

D'Angelo tries to keep Col. Potter under control from the beginning, preferring to run the hospital as if it was a for-profit, money-making venture, obsessed with paperwork and PR. In fact, the only people on staff who seem to appreciate Col. Potter and Klinger are the young, idealistic doctor Gene Pfeiffer (Jay O. Sanders) and a secretary named Bonnie Hornbeck (Wendy Schaal) who really takes a shine to Klinger.

Col. Potter makes contact with a troubled Korean war veteran named Danny Madden (Arliss Howard), who eventually shows up at Col. Potter's home, keeping Mrs. Potter a sort of hostage. Col. Potter arrives and talks Madden down.

Meanwhile, Col. Potter gets a call from a friend of Father Mulcahy's, telling him that his old friend is in bad shape--demoralized by his hearing loss, Mulcahy has turned to booze. Potter asks to talk to Mulcahy, realizing how serious it is.

Potter arranges a hearing specialist to perform a brand-new type of surgery on Father Mulcahy, which goes well, slowly restoring Mulcahy's hearing. Potter tells Mulcahy that the hospital needs a new chaplain, and offers the job to Mulcahy. He accepts, and Klinger is delighted to be with his two old friends again.


Fun Facts: Not having seen this show since it aired in 1983, I was pleasantly surprised at how much I enjoyed these opening two episodes. It flows well, and its commentary about life in post-war 1950s America is, for the most part, spot on.

The only real problem with this episode(s) is--they're not that funny. There are a couple of funny lines, but nothing that you laugh out loud at. No, for these episodes, its the dramatic moments that really shine: during Klinger's scene in the courtroom, there's an especially sharp line about how his Korean wife is given looks "You wouldn't give to Eva Braun."

There's another particularly nice moment right at the beginning, when Col. Potter gets out of a cab and attempts to tip the driver. The driver waves off the tip and gives him a salute, a touching little scene. Watching these two shows over again, I was really taken with the dramatic moments--I thought some of them were as good as anything on M*A*S*H.

In the credits, right at the end, there is one of the strangest credit lines I've ever seen on a show:

"A continuation of M*A*S*H"--? I mean, sure, we all know that, but talk about putting the show behind the eight ball!


Favorite Line: Dr. Pfeiffer is embarrassed to mention that his female patient has VD. Klinger, misunderstanding, thinks he's referring to the rigid Alma Cox: "Alma Cox? Wow! Who volunteered?"

Mail Call: Russell Burbage

I got a mystery package in Mail Call yesterday, sent to me none other than Maxwell Q. Klinger!

Inside a very heavy, well-packed box was two cans of chili, two cans of hot dog sauce, and one jar of relish, all from the Tony Packo's of Toledo, Ohio!

Max even sent a note:

...that sure was nice of Max to send all this stuff along (although, judging by the return address label, I think he had help from my pal and M*A*S*H fan Russell Burbage). After hearing about the legendary Tony Packo's for so long, its cool to have some of the actual food in my house.

Of course, since Darlin' Tracy and I are both vegetarians, we won't actually be eating any of the food, but I still appreciate the gesture, Max!

Mail Call: Steve Spatucci

My pal and M*A*S*H fan Steve Spatucci sent me this wonderful photo of himself, rocking a M*A*S*H t-shirt--and tube socks!

Steve thinks the photo is from 1982, but the shirt has the show's beginning and end dates--1972/1983--on it, so I think he may be off by a year. Clearly, I know his life better than he does.

I wish I had a photo of myself like this, its way cool. If anyone else has a pic like this and wants it to be part of the just-made-up Mail Call feature, please send it in!

The Interview: David Pollock

I knew I wanted this blog's last post (last regular post, at least) to feature something special, and I can't think of anything more special to me than an interview with one of the people who actually worked on M*A*S*H.

The interviewee in question is writer David Pollock, who, in tandem with his writing partner Elias Davis, first wrote for M*A*S*H in the ninth season and stayed with the show until its history-making conclusion, also serving as Executive Story Consultant.

I first got in touch with David back in 2007, when I wrote a piece called "Memories, M*A*S*H" for my Hey Kids, Comics! blog, concerning one of my favorites episodes of the show, the Eleventh Season "Run For The Money."

I asked David for some background info on that particular episode, and he was extremely generous with his time, making the piece a very special one for me. I kept in touch with him ever since, and when I was deciding whether or not to do interviews for this blog, he was the first one I contacted.

I ultimately decided against doing interviews as any sort of regular feature of this blog, but I knew I wanted to do at least one before I yelled "Timmmm-ber!" on this particular Swamp. So let's get to it:

Rob Kelly: How did you end up on M*A*S*H?

David Pollock: Elias Davis and I always wrote together, and we were sort of on the show twice. We wrote one in, maybe around 1974--it never got filmed, it was one of those ones that was set aside, because it never quite seemed to work.

In 1972 we did some Mary Tyler Moore episodes, and then we did an episode of a Don Rickles show. We had come off the Dick Van Dyke show, a later show he did from Arizona--we did from 1972 to 1973, then we did the Mary Tyler Moore shows freelance. We weren't on staff of the show, and we did about four of those.

Somebody recommended us, I guess, so we went in an pitched [for M*A*S*H] to Larry Gelbart and Laurence Marks with about fifteen ideas. I'm not sure whether Gene Reynolds was there or not. And we pitched all these notions, and one of them we had, just to fill up the page, was about a bathtub arriving. I can't remember anything else about it other than the novelty of a bathtub, and that was the one Larry Gelbart picked.

That was the one we had the least research on, it was just the goofiest, so we just wrote a story, and blocked it all out. But it just didn't work--I can't tell you why, but it was never shot.

Then, around 1980, we wrote another episode called "Cementing Relationships", but I'm getting ahead of you.

RK: [Laughs] Yeah--well, around that time, were you guys still freelancing at that point, or had you come on staff? Because you're both credited as Executive Story Consultants, as well.

DP: We did a handful of episodes, just freelance, they kept hiring us to do more. I know we did a two-parter that they ended up slamming together as a one-hour show. Because of the writer's strike the seasons got all sort of wacky.

RK: That would be "That's Show Biz", where the USO troop shows up.

DP: Yeah, with Gwen Verdon, I think that's around the time we came on staff. We did 19 episodes total.

RK: You've always written with Elias Davis. How did that work? Did you write separately and compare notes, or did you write everything together?

DP: We would sit with two desks, just the way most teams would work, whether we were freelancing or on staff. When we were on staff, we were in the writer's building, with everybody else, and everybody had their own office. Thad Mumford and Dan Wilcox were downstairs. Two desks, shoved face to face--that's just the way ours worked.

We would just start on page one: "Fade In: Interior: Swamp--Day"

RK: [Laughs]

DP: By the time we were writing a script, we would have the story worked out in the room with all the guys: Burt Metcalfe, etc. Even when we were freelancing, we would work the story out with all the writers, or a good percentage of them: some of them might have been out writing something. There were no set rules.

RK: When coming up with stories, the natural inclination must have been to write a Hawkeye-centric story, since he was sort of the star--"First among equals" was the term I think I read once--so did you have trouble coming up with stories for particular characters or didn't it work that way?

DP: You're certainly right in that the Hawkeye character was central to the whole--the sort of drive shaft for the series--but, the Hawkeye issue aside--you wouldn't necessarily steer to one writer or another solely for the purpose of the character. The story itself would dictate, in any given scene, what characters needed to be there.

RK: Okay, so there wasn't a concentrated effort to say, write a Father Mulcahy episode. It was more story driven, and you worked from there.

DP: You're talking about Elias and I, no. You have to remember, there were two stages, two huge stages for the writing on episode--you can't just sit down and start on page one, because you don't even know what the story is yet.

You have the story first--just the story, what's going to happen--forgetting any dialogue, and forgetting who says what. Its just "What the heck is this thing going to be about?"

And its more collaborative at this point--its not only Elias and I, as I recall those days, it would be, in one room--which was Burt Metcalfe's office--Room 29, in the writer's building on the second floor--a rather functional, unglamorous room, it would be all of us sitting around on couches and chairs. It would be Elias and I, and Burt, with Burt sort of running the thing, John Rappaport, Dennis Koenig, Karen Hall, Dan and Thad...and you're starting with nothing, absolutely nothing.

But as you know, the show would do research--starting way back, Burt and Larry would interview doctors, doing research, getting any anecdote, and those interviews would be recorded, and they would be transcribed. And, as you can imagine, you'd get a lot of useless information--it might be interesting, but its not anything you could use to make a funny television episode.

So you might get a copy of these things, and in the course of the meeting, someojne might throw something in--somebody just threw in, one day, a MASH doctor remembered, in the course of telling a story about a big operation he just happened to mention, that they got a shipment of fresh eggs, and that was all we pulled out of there--eggs.

RK: Yeah, that's in "A Holy Mess"--while Father Mulcahy is dealing with a solider who wants sanctuary, the other story is about a shipment of eggs.

DP: Oh yeah, right. That just came out of an offhand comment, while relating what the MASH veteran, the doctor on the phone, thought was a bigger story, about an operation.

I know a story that we did was based on the fact that I just happened to read a 1953 almanac, that the Korean War was going badly, and back in the States--sort of like Afghanistan now, people were tired of it--Truman needed support, or maybe it was Eisenhower--that they had decided to offer a prize to any North Korean who surrendered.

RK: Wow, I didn't know that was a real thing!

DP: Yeah, it was a real thing--but it was just two sentences in an almanac, and we contrived a whole story around that. I remember the PR guy was played by Jeffrey Tambor. We ran into him years later on the street and we were talking about that. We exaggerated it, of course--we had him giving away a Philco radio or something.

RK: [Laughs] I'm stunned that had any reality behind it.

DP: Yeah, a guy actually flew his plane into South Korea. So, from that, you pull that fact out, and then we just sit around the room and try to come up with a story. Then you try and break it into little scenes. I think we then had a story about Winchester becoming involved with a French lady--and I think those two stories were a and B stories in the episode.

RK: Yes, "Foreign Affairs." [Laughs]--I know all these titles off the top of my head.

DP: [Laughs] Yeah, and we wrote that--our French was so terrible, that we wrote it all in English and the had someone translate it into proper French.

RK: That's one of my favorite episodes, because Winchester didn't get many romantic storylines, so it was a nice insight into his character.

DP: Yeah.

RK: At the point you and Elias came on the show, in the ninth season, M*A*S*H was about as popular as any TV show has ever been. I'm wondering, was there a lot of network interference, or did CBS sit back and just accept as much M*A*S*H as you could produce?

DP: I think the latter--I don't remember any...the network representative for the show was Darrell Hickman, the actor who played Dobie Gillis, and he used to come around and see how things were going. If there was interference, it would never come to Elias and I, that would've been directed to Burt.

RK: So there was never any problem with plots? I've read about the early years, where Larry Gelbart had problems with certain stories or scenes. But that was when the show wasn't as popular.

DP: My sense of it was, they just stood back, and let it sail through.

RK: You would think. Did you follow M*A*S*H as a viewer, before you came on it?

DP: I didn't watch it every week, but I was pretty familiar with it.

RK: Do you have favorite episodes, either ones you didn't write or ones you did?

DP: In terms of ones we didn't write, a particular favorite of mine, and I sense it was a favorite of the other guys, since we talked about it a few times, was an episode from the first four years...it had to do with an army general who arrives, a tough blood and guts kind of guy. And he sleeps with Margaret, and then dies...

RK: Yes, "Iron Guts Kelly."

DP: "Iron Guts Kelly"--that was great. They got James Gregory to play him. That was a great show. In fact, I go back and lecture to comedy writing classes and the University of Michigan, and I play that episode.

As for the ones I wrote, I don't know if I have any particular favorites. One of the ones we won a Humanitas Award, was "Where There's A Will, There's A War", that had to do with Hawkeye writing his will, but there we were using a format that Larry had hit upon years earlier, where Hawkeye would write a letter to his Dad, and using that as a framework, you'd see the scenes he was writing about.

In the later years, when we were really hard-pressed for new stories, we used that framework, that construction, so we just piggy-backed that device for that show. I always liked that one.

There was another one we won another Humanitas for, called "Who Knew?"

RK: Yes, the one where the nurse gets killed.

DP: Boy, you really do know these...

RK: [Laughs] Yeah, I can't tell you how many times I've seen these--I've pretty much been watching them non-stop since I was they went into syndication, and then the DVDs.

I've been trying to avoid asking you any uber-MASH Nerd-type of questions, but there's one thing I've always wondered about, and its related to an episode like "Where There's A Will..."--in a show like that, where you've got flashbacks to different time periods--you flash all the way back to when Col. Potter had just arrived at the 4077th--was there ever any consideration given to the idea of bringing back some of the old characters, like Henry or Trapper?

DP: [Pauses] The practicalities of that...you pretty much have to deal with the hand you have. You could conceivably do it--other actors have reappeared in a show--but you're trying to find parts for all these characters--that's hard enough!

RK: [Laughs] Right.

DP: Then to go out and try and bring Henry Blake in, when you've got Jamie Farr sitting there at the table read, reading the script, thinking "Jesus, I've only got one line on page fifteen, two lines over here on page thirty-one, and they bring Henry Blake back?"

RK: [Big laughs] That's what I figured that's probably what it was.

DP: You've got a budget, a certain amount of money, and you're trying to keep all the actors happy--it was such a big cast it was tough to work everybody in as it is. You have to find something for all these people, so it would've been pretty hard to do that.

RK: I think maybe, because of the internet and the way TV has changed, there's much more of a vocal fanbase for any given show, you have more of that obsessive following than you did when M*A*S*H was on. Fans follow shows so much more closely now, and there's so much more feedback.

Joss Whedon, on Buffy the Vampire Slayer, would bring back a character for one line--one line!--in a dream sequence or something, and that would be kind of a gift to the die-hard fans. But that wasn't something you saw on TV a lot in earlier years.

DP: We never were aware to catering to any fans. Nor were we aware of the idea of coming up with an anti-war message every week, we were just trying to come up with a good story for each show. The rest never really occurred to us.

RK: How did you make sure to get all the military and medical details right? Did you ever start a show with a military-specific premise then try and make sure you got it right?

DP: We had an Army guy that we would call with military questions. You'd always do the story first--you'd have a wacky thing. There was always supply screw-ups, so you'd call the Army and say "How could this happen?", and they'd tell you, to make it sound real.

And then medically--there was a doctor, Dr. Dishell--who you could always call say, "Walter, here's the thing--we need to have this happen", and we need to make the dialogue sound real. It didn't have to be real, but it had to sound real. So he would just say, "Here's what you gotta do--you'd need a sponge, you'd need this, you'd need that..." We'd leave all that stuff blank and fill it in later.

RK: [Laughs] Regarding the final episode, as it approached...how was that constructed? You had to end the war, obviously, and every character has their own final storyline, but were there things you all wanted to make sure you got in there?

DP: We all sat around--it was arrived at the same way--with all of us in a room, and as I recall, Burt had some pretty strong ideas, and there Alan [Alda] was present. It was started pretty early, and shot out of sequence, and Alan had a lot of input into it.

Alan was also one of the writers, Dan and Thad wrote as a team, Elias and I wrote as a team, Dennis wrote by himself, as did John, and Alan wrote with all of us. We all wrote independent of each other, and the final show was broken down into half-hour increments. Elias and I wrote the first half-hour--we had the outline by then, and it was just writing the script. Alan's way of working was just talking into a tape recorder, and then he'd move on to the next group, and that's how the writing was done.

[Later] There was sort of a feeling among some of the writers that, while it was a nice episode, the dramatic comedy quotient tilted too much in favor of the dramatic--it wasn't as funny as some of the other episodes. That was always how I felt about it, and I think Elias felt that way.

RK: That show set a record--that will surely never be topped--as the highest-rated single show in TV history.

DP: A 77 share.

RK: Yeah. I remember being in Sixth Grade when that aired, and every kid on the playground--every kid--was talking about watching the show that night.

DP: The show had a party [the night of the final episode airing] at a Moroccan restaurant, here in LA, on Westwood Boulevard, and I remember driving there, and there was nobody on the streets--no traffic--everyone was home watching it.

RK: In the intervening years, do you keep in touch with any of the people from the show?

DP: Yeah, over the years, we'll have lunch with Burt, or we'll run into Thad and Dan, you know, you bump into people--its a big town, but its a small town, too. Oddly enough, tonight there's a big memorial service everyone is going to for Larry Gelbart.

RK: Well, I want to thank you for talking to me for the blog, David. I really appreciate it and thanks for all your wonderful work on M*A*S*H.

DP: You're welcome, Rob, my pleasure.


It was a huge thrill for this M*A*S*H fan to get to talk to the David Pollock and learn a little bit about what it was like to work on the show. David was very generous with his time and a total delight to talk to, and I couldn't think of a better way to wrap up this blog.

...and that does wrap up AfterM*A*S*H.blogspot.com, for now at least. I was hesitant for a long time to even start this, realizing I had to make sure I had the time to do it right--the show deserved no less than my full effort.

I thank all of you who discovered the blog early on and stuck with it as we worked our way through all eleven seasons and assorted M*A*S*H bric-a-brac. It's been a lot of fun reading everyone's thoughts about any given episode.

And who knows? Maybe I'll have the chance to talk to some of the other people who made M*A*S*H. And if I do, rest assured you'll see those interviews here. (That's one of the things I love about blogs...they're never really quite finished, if you don't want them to be!)

In the meantime, I highly endorse the all-encompassing M*A*S*H blog Finest Kind for your daily online M*A*S*H fix. Its a great site, as obsessive about the show as I am.

So, until we meet again, thanks again everyone and be sure to watch the M*A*S*H re-runs...rest assured, they're on somewhere, on some channel, right now!
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That was how I intended to wrap up the blog, but some of you M*A*S*H fans just won't let me do that. In fact, the regular commenter known as What The Parrot Saw, in a very Klinger-esque move, generously sent me a bootleg(shhhh!) disc of all but two episodes of AfterM*A*S*H, shows I have not seen since they aired over twenty-five years ago!

I've had fun watching these shows over again, so I decided that, yes, this blog will keep going for a little while longer--I'll be doing posts focusing on AfterM*A*S*H!

Not knowing these shows backwards and forwards like I do M*A*S*H, I need some time to watch and absorb them all. So this blog will be taking a little break while I do that, and will return February 28--the blog's one-year anniversary--where we'll talk about AfterM*A*S*H and the further adventures of Col. Potter, Klinger, and Father Mulcahy!

Crossword Puzzle - 2/24/09

Back in February 2009, I was contemplating whether to officially start my long-considered idea for a M*A*S*H blog. I knew it would be a ton of work, and even though I knew I would enjoy immersing myself so deeply in the show, I was still nervous about getting into what would be at least a year-long project.

I was mulling it over one day, a day that I dropped my car off at my local garage to get an oil change. I sat in the waiting room and picked up a local newspaper that is published expressly for the High Speed Line (a train running from NJ into Philly).

I absent-mindedly leafed through the pages, hitting the crossword puzzle in the back:

...what were the odds?

It felt like fate, so as soon as I got home I started getting everything ready to, and here we are, a little less than a year and a whole lot of episodes later.


I have one more item for the blog, which we'll get to tomorrow. Its something really special to me, so I figured it was the best way to go out. Be here tomorrow, M*A*S*H-fans!

The Toughest Ticket - 1984

This ad (drawn by my former instructor Joe Kubert!) appeared in issues of DC Comics, starting with books cover-dated April 1984. This particular one came from my copy of Justice League of America #225.

Aside from the numerous unusual aspects of the ad (Sgt. Rock talking to the real-life Ed McMahon, an appeal clearly meant for adults running in comic books), its the fifth panel that's really intriguing for any M*A*S*H fan:

...so let me get this straight: there were radio show-style productions of M*A*S*H episodes broadcast in V.A. hospitals? Wow!

I have to think that somewhere, somehow, tapes of at least one or two of these shows (assuming they did more than one M*A*S*H, which is a big assumption) must still exist. I'd absolutely kill for the chance to hear one of them (Btw--for completion's sake: the above dialog is from Season Five's "Last Laugh")--I bet they're amazing things to behold.

I have absolutely no idea where I'd start looking for such recordings, but every time I look through an old comic that has this ad, I think about it all over again...

Simon Pegg in Time Magazine - 2009

Time magazine runs a feature where a famous person answers questions sent in by readers.

One issue from early 2009 featured Simon Pegg, who I'm a big fan of (Spaced, Hot Fuzz, Shaun of the Dead, Star Trek), so I was of course interested in the piece.

But the above question and answer surprised me--who knew Simon Pegg was such a big M*A*S*H fan? Now I like him even more than I did before!

IBM Commercials - 1986/1987

In 1986, IBM hired most of the cast of M*A*S*H to appear in a series of commercials for their home and business computers.

I remember seeing these when they first ran, and in the days when VCRs were still pretty new (in our house, anyway) it was a thrill for this M*A*S*H fan to catch these mini-reunions!

The commercial pictured at the very top featured Alan Alda, Harry Morgan, Loretta Swit, Gary Burghoff, Jamie Farr, even Kellye Nakahara! The one below that starred Larry Linville, Gary Burghoff, and William Christopher. You can see them (and another, just starring Jamie Farr) here.

I hate to repeat myself (wait, no I don't), but man it would've been a wonderful treat for 20th Century Fox to assemble all these and put them on the Martinis & Medicine box set!

M*U*S*H - 1975

I bet, if asked, most of you would answer "No" to the question, "Was there ever a cartoon parody of M*A*S*H starring anthropomorphic police dogs?"

And you'd be wrong!

Yes, if you can believe it, M*U*S*H debuted on ABC in 1975 and was about a group of police dogs, with characters named General Upheaval, Col. Flake, Coldlips, and Major Sideburns. It ran for 30 episodes, into 1976, giving it a longer run than AfterM*A*S*H!

One volume of M*U*S*H was released on video tape, and you can still find the opening credits on Youtube. If I still had a VCR, I'd buy a beat-up old copy of the show just to see what in the holy hell went on.

The Carol Burnett Show - 3/22/75

One bizarre bit of M*A*S*H trivia centers around the March 22, 1975 episode of The Carol Burnett Show.

Apparently this episode, which aired only days after M*A*S*H's Season Three groundbreaking episode "Abyssinia, Henry", opens with guest-star McLean Stevenson, dressed as Henry Blake, in a raft, waving his arms, hollering, "I'm OK! I'm OK!"

I had never heard of this until I started doing research for the blog. The Carol Burnett Show isn't yet available on DVD in anything other than "Best of" compilations, so there was no way for me to find a copy of the show and watch it for myself.

From just reading about it, part of me thinks its brilliant. Another part of me thinks, considering the pitch-perfect, emotionally wrenching episode its spoofing, it seems ghoulish and just plain weird.

Nevertheless, I'm dying to see it someday!

Trapper John, M.D.

I guess no listing of M*A*S*H's spin-offs would exactly be complete without mentioning Trapper John, M.D.

The funny thing is, the makers of the show themselves insisted at the time that the show was not a spin-off of M*A*S*H the TV show; rather, it was a spin-off of the movie, thereby sidestepping certain legal issues.

As absurd as that argument seems, apparently they got away with it. What's even more amazing is that, in the opening minutes of the very first episode (which you can see on YouTube), there is a long tracking shot of Trapper (now played by Pernell Roberts).

The camera pans by some framed photos hanging on Trapper's wall:

...its hard to tell, but these look like stills from the TV show, not the movie! And that's pretty clearly Wayne Rogers and Alan Alda up top, there. How the heck did the producers get away with that?

Trapper John, M.D., had a solid run on CBS from 1979 to 1986. I remember watching the show pretty regularly, and I would be delighted when the show made the occasional reference to Trapper's experiences at the 4077th.

Sadly(?), we never did get to see any of his 4077th colleagues show up to visit ol' Trap.

AfterM*A*S*H and W*A*L*T*E*R

AfterM*A*S*H debuted on September 26, 1983, and starred Harry Morgan, Jamie Farr, and William Christopher returning in their familiar roles. The show also starred Rosalind Chao as Soon-Lee, and Barbara Townsend as Mildred Potter.

The show ran for (almost) two seasons and 29 episodes, although the last show (last as in last filmed, not a series finale) was never aired.

The show apparently started off well, ratings-wise, but when those started to dip the dreaded "re-tooling" began--characters were dumped, new ones brought on, and some roles were re-cast (a second actress, Anne Pitoniak, took over the role of Mildred Potter--ah yes, that will turn it all around!).

The show's ratings continued to decline, and CBS essentially dumped the show unceremoniously, airing the last two episodes a full two months after the previous one.

In many circles, AfterM*A*S*H is considered synonymous with bad spin-offs, but from what I remember (admittedly, I haven't seen the show since it aired, and back then I enjoyed the Friday the 13th movies, too) the show wasn't that bad. Indeed, the premise--dealing with veterans after they've come back from a war--is extremely fertile ground for the kind of tough, no-nonsense comedy/drama combo that M*A*S*H was famous for.

Two other M*A*S*H veterans made guest appearances on the show--the late Edward Winter as Col. Flagg, and Gary Burghoff as Radar, which leads us to...

...W*A*L*T*E*R!

W*A*L*T*E*R was a pilot for a proposed series, starring Gary Burghoff once again as Walter "Radar" O'Reilly. Apparently rejected as a series, it aired as a one-off "special" on July 17, 1984. In it, Radar has become a police officer. I remember watching the show, still interested in all things M*A*S*H, even a year after the show went off the air.

July 17, 1984 was the same night that CBS was covering the 1984 Democratic National Convention, so W*A*L*T*E*R didn't even air in the Pacific and Mountain time zones. Considering how badly the Deomcrats would lose in 1984, I'd say everyone would've been better off with W*A*L*T*E*R.


Like AfterM*A*S*H, W*A*L*T*E*R (boy, that's annoying, typing all those asterisks) has essentially never been heard or seen from since (although you can find pieces of the W*A*L*T*E*R pilot on Youtube).

Obviously there might--mostly likely were--be other issues involved, but I think it would've been nice for 20th Century Fox to include at least the two show pilots as part of the big M*A*S*H boxed set, if only for curiosity's sake.