Episode 88 - Dear Ma

Season 4, Episode 88: Dear Ma
Original Air Date: 12/23/75
Written by: Jim Fritzell & Everett Greenbaum
Directed by: Alan Alda

Radar writes a letter home to his mother, telling her about the recent goings-on at the 4077th.

Radar has been helping Hawkeye in giving the camp a monthly foot inspection, which goes smoothly except for Hot Lips,who can't stand Hawkeye's joking around.

Meanwhile, B.J. buys an expensive watch on the cheap from a former patient, claiming he needed the money for an operation for his wife. Hawkeye has to break the news to B.J. he's been scammed, showing him that there are no works inside it. B.J. is infuriated--"And I operated on that guy's chest!" Hawkeye finds the whole thing funny, having heard of this scam before.

Another day, Radar came across a North Korean soldier who wandered into the Mess Tent to get some food. At first he doesn't realize the guy is North Korean, but it dawns on him just as the soldier runs out of the tent with a tray full of food. He bumps into Frank chasing him, spilling food on Frank's shirt. Frank is not amused.

Hawkeye, still doing the inspections, tells Frank its his turn, but Frank is hostile and refuses. Hawkeye lets it go for the moment.

That same night, Col. Potter gets shot in the butt by a sniper while he and Hot Lips were delivering supplies to some locals. Hawkeye and B.J. remove the shrapnel, with Potter having to pretend he's fine while on the phone with his wife--she called, having a premonition that something bad has happened to her husband.

Wounded arrive, and one of them is the solider that scammed B.J. Laying on the table, he gulps in fear when B.J. promises he'll have him "working as well as that watch you sold me."

At the end of the night, Hawkeye and B.J. lay in wait for Frank. They grab him, and pull his shoes off, to reveal...painted toe-nails?

Frank is ashamed, and B.J. asks if that isn't Hot Lips' color. Frank fesses up and asks it not be mentioned in the report. Hawkeye agrees, writing that Frank suffers from some discoloration "due to actions involving a hostile manicurist."

Radar ends his letter to his mother, telling her how much he misses her.


Fun Facts: Another episode in the "Dear..." format, this time it's Radar's turn.


Favorite Line: After Hawkeye shows B.J. he's been scammed, he says he'll return to inspect B.J. at 9 o'clock.

B.J., slightly disgusted but partly amused: "How will I know?"